Re: Rat Poison

This is in response to Wes's latest post Rat Poison.

All too often we get caught up in the fact that "I cannot forgive him or her" because "you don't know what they did to me". When we get in this pattern of thinking we hurt ourselves more than we hurt the other person. If that person really did what you say they did and they ment it like you say they did, your forgiveness probably doesn't mean as much to them. There are exceptions, and not everyone thinks this way, but allow me to continue. But how do you feel when you with hold your forgiveness from this person? You constantly think about it, you are so bitter about what this person did to you you cannot stop thinking about it. Its as though you are being forced to re-live it day after day.

Forgiveness is such a freeing thing.

If you allow yourself to forgive this person that wronged you, it will be as through you have a burden lifted off your shoulder. You will no longer be consumed with what this person did to you. It doesn't mean that person never hurt you, but you are no longer allowing the thought to hurt you day after day. Memories are not always kind to us, when you forgive you can let go of what happened.

Forgiveness does not mean you are okay with what that person did to you. Forgiveness means that your mind will no longer be consumed with what that person did to you.

Because someone is forgiven does not mean that what they did is now right. When a man rapes a woman, if she can forgive him, she is not telling him she is okay with what she did, or that she thinks it is now right, she is saying that she is not going to allow this to consume her daily.

Forgiveness might also be letting something go. Forgiveness doesn't mean you are saying "It's okay, don't worry about it". Think about what Jesus said when he forgave someone "Your sins are forgiven, go and sin NO MORE!" Forgiveness might mean saying "I forgive you, but please, please never do that again".

Like Wes said don't forgive for them, forgive for you.